Kind freedom

Kindness. It’s an act that can mean so much for a person. Thoughtfulness. Empathy. Three beautiful actions that can make our world better. Instead, there are people trying to break others. Just to feel better about themselves. With the use of hatred, disgust and disrespect. Even writing those words are hard for me, but it’s the sad truth.

In my life I have known a lot of anger in me. I felt angry and sad, thinking people didn’t get me. Thinking I didn’t belong, which I wanted so badly. Around the age of 16 I realized I didn’t want to belong. I learned to be happy by myself. The anger wasn’t gone, but the desire to belong disappeared. It gave me a sense of freedom.

Something I didn’t see with the people around me. They always belonged somewhere and became afraid of losing their place in their crowd.

I hoped that sense of freedom also freed me from the unkind actions of those persons, but it didn’t and it never will. At this moment I am determined to stay kind. However, I still need to find a way to cope with the actions of the unkind and hatred. I even wonder if I ever want to cope. Because certainly hatred isn’t something I want to give in to. Perhaps staying calm and kind is the best way to fight the evil. Even when the results aren’t what you were hoping for. You were you, kind and that’s all that matters in the end.

Lose and love

Living from the heart seems so vulnerable and dangerous to many

But can save so many who have lost their heart and soul in brutal ways

It takes courage and wisdom

To answer these questions of life

When we are so used to protect

Ourselves over the souls of others

~

๐Ÿน๐ŸŒธ๐Ÿ’—๐ŸŒธ

~

#bebrave #chooselove #respect #fromtheheart #heart #heartandsoul #love

Vallen, opstaan en door

Ontwikkeling wordt vergeten, onderschat en ondergewaardeerd. Niet altijd allemaal bij dezelfde persoon of instantie. Ook niet met opzet. Soms zijn we gewoon zo druk met de zaken die op dit moment spelen en dat is natuurlijk niet verkeerd. Er zijn momenten dat je ook gericht moet zijn op het nu, maar om het nu te hanteren is een visie voor de toekomst nodig. Een einddoel. Of een subdoel wat een onderdeel is van het einddoel. lvChaos is voor mij beiden en weer een nieuwe stap voor mijn onderneming. Wat is begonnen met Verawaty wordt aangevuld met lvChaos. Hoe dit vorm gaat krijgen, is nog een verrassing. Een impressie is te vinden via @lvchfairytales ~ het staat in ieder geval voor vernieuwen, doorgaan en ontwikkelen, ondanks de tegenslagen. Ontwikkeling gaat met vallen en opstaan, maar uiteindelijk komen we wel verder dan we waren ~ ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿฝ๐ŸŒธ๐Ÿน ~ #lvchaos #love #chaos #inspiration #inspiratie #ontwikkeling #ondernemen #zelfontwikkeling #zzp #freelance #freelancer

Ivy ~ Boyfriend for now

Relationships are not for me. They feel uncomfortable. I don’t know why I am not a person who doesn’t feel safe when a boy says I love you.

I didn’t feel this way during my first relationship. Safe I don’t know, but I did feel a sense of joy. With Lennart I don’t. It’s like I can’t believe his love for me.

It is to soon to talk about love. We only know each other for a few weeks. He is my boyfriend, for now. Until he knows better. Until his parents realize he’s better of with a girl that makes sense.

Not me. I am always a surprise. Too much, just like years ago. She doesn’t know. My mom doesn’t know that’s how I feel. Too much. Always.

Ivy ~ Broken picture

Surprised I was by his adoration for me. Especially after all the tiring years I had. When I was at his parents house that day, I wasn’t even thinking about getting to know him.

Yes I adored him in my teenage years. However, years wentby and our paths never crossed so we couldn’t start anything. He was kind of a playboy and wasn’t looking for anything serious. I was and I thought to find the person to start a life with. Even though I was young. All my friends had serious boyfriends. I thought I’ve found mine to.

I was wrong. It was all wrong. He wanted me, but he didn’t want me. Just the outside. The picture. What I looked like. When I really needed him, he wasn’t ready to invest or be loyal. He looked away. So I left. He couldn’t choose me after a few of his friends attacked me. They were his friends. I probably made a mistake.

I left. But I was broken. Now I can’t believe love if it’s next to me. From anyone. My parents don’t know. Nobody does. Just me. And him. He’s gone. I am here, but I can’t see anymore.